To my Father

The phone keep ringing and with impatience I wait the answer and finally his voice on the other side I couldn't control myself and sobbing I rush to express my feelings asking for advice, it's ironic that the one to whom I left behind is the one ready to help me and after a long pause with a sweet smile and soft voice he says I remember that feeling but today I will tell you what to do..,
He took seconds that felt like days to start talking... I remember the days of your youth since you were little I so something in you that everybody else did, everyone but you and I worked hard piling bricks everyday to take care of you to make sure you were sleeping sound and safe and it was never enough you always wanted more and I felt incapable of keeping up with your dreams, you always wanted more, always ahead of the rest, ambitious and smart and the it hit me.
You always had the words to change people, always had the heart to give without receiving, always curious about what was beyond the stars, always a leader, always inside you the need to go beyond yourself... at that moment I'm listening like a child listens to a bed time story... another pause... and after a wasp he said you were born to be a Man of God, but you lost yourself looking out there what was inside you and I wasn't able to stop you but I never stop praying for you my son.
Man of God? I'm not a religious person, makes no sense to me how's that related to my present experience? so I do what I do best ask questions... My father smiles and told me you know what to do, you are smart, you change the course of your life and still haven't get there yet, but don't play fool to play fool you have to be smart just close your eyes and when you are done call me back.

It takes me hard focus to stop thinking and I want to do a prayer, a prayer I haven't done before but before I can, the sound of silence starts talking; Your Father was your guardian angel, the times he corrected you he did it because he didn't want you to get lost... it hurt at that time but now it hurts more because in exchange for his care I was ungrateful then the silence continues talking: I gave you greatness and the same greatness destroy you because you didn't listen, you run after a dream that was a mirage and instead of listening to the wise guardian Angel you listen to the foolish voice of those who don't know and pretend to know... But I haven't giving up on you... I open my eyes and with sarcasm with a twisted smile I said to myself sure here we go again... before I keep been stupid the voice interrupt me: I gave the gift of greatness not to you but to your blood, that's why they feel the same feeling you always felt, emptiness, void mind and confusion I haven't giving up on you!
Now pictures in my mind, She is just like me... repeating the same mistakes and looking for something it was giving to her before the day she so the light, looking for a guardian Angel that's been there all the time as mine was there, looking for something that is been giving already...
As I open my eyes sadness has not left yet but peace pours from my head down to my chest, two are stronger than one... I remember that from my Bible... so when one falls the other one pick him up, and the voice again, got you! You feel this way because the two of you are strong together... that's cool... I ask for forgiveness because it was very stupid to think that a man without God can do better, for thinking that my family will be better in the middle of a lost society and without purpose, and the voice again: It's her decision now but I haven't giving up on her either! every time she felt empty it was me telling her I'm here just talk and listen...

To my Guardian Angel: thank you my dear Father for those years when you were in my life, sorry for leaving you and for been rebel to your correction, now I know that if I would stayed with you I would never lost my path... thanks my dear father, but I'm not done yet because of my mistakes I delayed my arrival but now I know what to do...

To my gift: Nothing will change my love for you, I will always be here as my Guardian Angel it's here for me, now that I know the truth about why? and you know the truth about who you are it's your decision... don't delay... we are stronger together. Don't lose your path let's walked together.